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This entertaining mix of prose and poetry runs from true family stories like The Biggest Ball of String where they visit said attraction to The Move to Beaufort where an Immigration Service Officer at the Texas border says to Denny, "Please give me your car keys, Sir!" and "Please step out of the vehicle, Sir!"
It also contains bizarre fiction short stories such as The Saga of the Danish Coconut set in the early 9th century when "Airwick the Malodorous", son of "Airsick the Barfer" and his Armada of two longboats, crewed by 27 Danish Vikings, one Swede, and Helga, having grown tired of raiding the British Isles and eating mutton, shepherd's pie, bangers and mash, and watercress sandwiches with no crusts, sailed out of Jutland turned Southwest and arrived at what is now known as Panama on what was called, "Ithmas" Day by Sarthia, Airwick's lisping navigator.
The poetry runs the gambit from the styles of Ogden Nash to Lenny Bruce and even has a few things for the kids in the family with titles such as Alphabet Soup, Avocados, Hair and other Miseries, The Tree, Tickle Time, Ramblings of a Sagittarian Octogenarian, A Child's Thanksgiving Rhyme, and Winnie Baygo.You may return most new, unopened items within 30 days of delivery for a full refund. We'll also pay the return shipping costs if the return is a result of our error (you received an incorrect or defective item, etc.).
You should expect to receive your refund within four weeks of giving your package to the return shipper, however, in many cases you will receive a refund more quickly. This time period includes the transit time for us to receive your return from the shipper (5 to 10 business days), the time it takes us to process your return once we receive it (3 to 5 business days), and the time it takes your bank to process our refund request (5 to 10 business days).
If you need to return an item, simply login to your account, view the order using the "Complete Orders" link under the My Account menu and click the Return Item(s) button. We'll notify you via e-mail of your refund once we've received and processed the returned item.
We can ship to virtually any address in the world. Note that there are restrictions on some products, and some products cannot be shipped to international destinations.
When you place an order, we will estimate shipping and delivery dates for you based on the availability of your items and the shipping options you choose. Depending on the shipping provider you choose, shipping date estimates may appear on the shipping quotes page.
Please also note that the shipping rates for many items we sell are weight-based. The weight of any such item can be found on its detail page. To reflect the policies of the shipping companies we use, all weights will be rounded up to the next full pound.
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