Get Discount 5% Off
Subscribe to our newsletters now and stay up-to-date with new arrivals, updates and deals.
Without the Burden of Sanity: The Adventures of Wilson Doorstaff and the Cave of Gold
Cyrus Magellan Mellon and Wilson Maramlade Doorstaff have been best friends since their youth. In financial dire...
- €30,13 EUR
- €30,13 EUR
- Unit price
- per
SKU:
9781667849461
Product Type:
Books
Please hurry! Only 6 left in stock
Couldn't load pickup availability
Cyrus Magellan Mellon and Wilson Maramlade Doorstaff have been best friends since their youth.
In financial dire straits, Wilson jubilantly discovers his father's long-lost treasure map. Fleeing dangerous Loan Sharks, the IRS and a burning Victorian mansion (which Wilson was supposed to be looking after), Wilson, his lethargic son Lloyd and Assistant Benny Hwang haul-ass from Kansas City down to Wilson's cave-riddled property in Arkansas in search of treasure. After a chaotic journey, slamming in an RV through the steep and pitted dirt roads of the backwoods, the trio arrive. There they are united with Cyrus Magellan Mellon and his lovely daughter, Jennifer Aubrey Mellon. Jennifer and Benny are whip-crack intelligent. Wilson's son Lloyd is sedentary, entitled and has an astounding ability to simultaneously form an erection and crap his shorts. Somewhat effete and utterly charming, Wilson Maramlade Doorstaff is privileged in the extreme. He's elated to reunite with his very best friend in the world, Cyrus Magellan Mellon, a delusional, kind-hearted, drug-addicted, clinically psychotic man of fifty who spends most of his time underground extending cave systems. Alone. With his Demons. He knows weaponry and the backwoods like the back of his hand. Cyrus served in the Marines in Vietnam before raising his daughter Jennifer on his own. (Jennifer's mother ran off with her meth dealer.) Raised without a touch of female influence, Jennifer is a redheaded tomboy in the extreme.
Both Wilson Doorstaff and Cyrus Mellon, best friends, are, well, just insane enough... At their core they are both kind-hearted.
They're eccentric enough that they will make you laugh. The humor in this tome ranges from over-the-top to so dry you might not catch it. (The British will. God bless 'em, they're good with that.) Back to the plot:
Cyrus deeply believes a terrifying Demon haunts the Ellis cave system, which is located under Wilson's property. Cyrus has a penchant for hunting the lurking Demon, blowing all sorts of things up and informing complete strangers than he
IS A MELLON.
Wilson, a self-proclaimed strenuously-cultivated alcoholic, believes that he's a refined man of culture and is overtly proud of his rotund son Lloyd. Lloyd's poetry, which is exclusively swan-based and fairly painful to read, is one pillar of the Doorstaff family's legacy of literary talent.. It's really, really, really bad poetry. Lloyd suffers, according to his father Wilson, from a
rare-but-all-too-common medical condition called IBS-EOF. It stands for Irritable Bowel Syndrome--Erectile-Over-Function You'll see. It's gross. Yep. I went there...Juvenile.. You'll see. Moving on,
Benny Hwang, Wilson Doorstaff's hired Assistant is a med-school dropout who utilizes his keen intelligence to aid in the utterly insane clusterfkucs which tend to ensue daily. Every element of their adventure that could go wrong indeed does go wrong. Read on and follow this intrepid team of innocent and kind souls into the hell of utter blackness in search of riches and in search of mental salvation. Rugged terrain, explosions, erection-crapping, bonfires, booze, laughter, and love. Onward.
Author: W. D. Benson
Publisher: Bookbaby
Published: 08/23/2022
Pages: 350
Binding Type: Paperback
Weight: 1.08lbs
Size: 8.47h x 5.58w x 0.85d
ISBN: 9781667849461
In financial dire straits, Wilson jubilantly discovers his father's long-lost treasure map. Fleeing dangerous Loan Sharks, the IRS and a burning Victorian mansion (which Wilson was supposed to be looking after), Wilson, his lethargic son Lloyd and Assistant Benny Hwang haul-ass from Kansas City down to Wilson's cave-riddled property in Arkansas in search of treasure. After a chaotic journey, slamming in an RV through the steep and pitted dirt roads of the backwoods, the trio arrive. There they are united with Cyrus Magellan Mellon and his lovely daughter, Jennifer Aubrey Mellon. Jennifer and Benny are whip-crack intelligent. Wilson's son Lloyd is sedentary, entitled and has an astounding ability to simultaneously form an erection and crap his shorts. Somewhat effete and utterly charming, Wilson Maramlade Doorstaff is privileged in the extreme. He's elated to reunite with his very best friend in the world, Cyrus Magellan Mellon, a delusional, kind-hearted, drug-addicted, clinically psychotic man of fifty who spends most of his time underground extending cave systems. Alone. With his Demons. He knows weaponry and the backwoods like the back of his hand. Cyrus served in the Marines in Vietnam before raising his daughter Jennifer on his own. (Jennifer's mother ran off with her meth dealer.) Raised without a touch of female influence, Jennifer is a redheaded tomboy in the extreme.
Both Wilson Doorstaff and Cyrus Mellon, best friends, are, well, just insane enough... At their core they are both kind-hearted.
They're eccentric enough that they will make you laugh. The humor in this tome ranges from over-the-top to so dry you might not catch it. (The British will. God bless 'em, they're good with that.) Back to the plot:
Cyrus deeply believes a terrifying Demon haunts the Ellis cave system, which is located under Wilson's property. Cyrus has a penchant for hunting the lurking Demon, blowing all sorts of things up and informing complete strangers than he
IS A MELLON.
Wilson, a self-proclaimed strenuously-cultivated alcoholic, believes that he's a refined man of culture and is overtly proud of his rotund son Lloyd. Lloyd's poetry, which is exclusively swan-based and fairly painful to read, is one pillar of the Doorstaff family's legacy of literary talent.. It's really, really, really bad poetry. Lloyd suffers, according to his father Wilson, from a
rare-but-all-too-common medical condition called IBS-EOF. It stands for Irritable Bowel Syndrome--Erectile-Over-Function You'll see. It's gross. Yep. I went there...Juvenile.. You'll see. Moving on,
Benny Hwang, Wilson Doorstaff's hired Assistant is a med-school dropout who utilizes his keen intelligence to aid in the utterly insane clusterfkucs which tend to ensue daily. Every element of their adventure that could go wrong indeed does go wrong. Read on and follow this intrepid team of innocent and kind souls into the hell of utter blackness in search of riches and in search of mental salvation. Rugged terrain, explosions, erection-crapping, bonfires, booze, laughter, and love. Onward.
Author: W. D. Benson
Publisher: Bookbaby
Published: 08/23/2022
Pages: 350
Binding Type: Paperback
Weight: 1.08lbs
Size: 8.47h x 5.58w x 0.85d
ISBN: 9781667849461
Returns Policy
You may return most new, unopened items within 30 days of delivery for a full refund. We'll also pay the return shipping costs if the return is a result of our error (you received an incorrect or defective item, etc.).
You should expect to receive your refund within four weeks of giving your package to the return shipper, however, in many cases you will receive a refund more quickly. This time period includes the transit time for us to receive your return from the shipper (5 to 10 business days), the time it takes us to process your return once we receive it (3 to 5 business days), and the time it takes your bank to process our refund request (5 to 10 business days).
If you need to return an item, simply login to your account, view the order using the "Complete Orders" link under the My Account menu and click the Return Item(s) button. We'll notify you via e-mail of your refund once we've received and processed the returned item.
Shipping
We can ship to virtually any address in the world. Note that there are restrictions on some products, and some products cannot be shipped to international destinations.
When you place an order, we will estimate shipping and delivery dates for you based on the availability of your items and the shipping options you choose. Depending on the shipping provider you choose, shipping date estimates may appear on the shipping quotes page.
Please also note that the shipping rates for many items we sell are weight-based. The weight of any such item can be found on its detail page. To reflect the policies of the shipping companies we use, all weights will be rounded up to the next full pound.
Best Sellers
- Choosing a selection results in a full page refresh.